Squatch Away!

As a person who lives out in the middle of nowhere, I live in constant fear of a bigfoot encounter. An encounter with 7 feet of muscle, fur, and attitude.

So you can imagine my relief when I discovered Squatch Away!, one of the greatest inventions to grace mankind. From the effective components to the wonderful scents, this product has eased my fears of running into a Sasquatch. I can sleep nights knowing that my Squatch Away!® enhanced home is safe. I no longer worry whenever I go camping. Even my car is a haven from bigfoot!

The best thing about Squatch Away!® however, is their awesome merchandise! I bought a hoodie early on, and it’s the best cold-blockin’, squatch-stoppin’ garment on the market.

Thank you Squatch Away!®, for putting my cryptozoological fears to rest.

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